Let's Talk About Sex!
Photo by:saye
Can you get pregnant from anal sex?
--Katie, 15, Trent, EnglandThe only way you could get pregnant that way would be for semen to leak from your anus to your vagina, which is highly unlikely. But that doesn't mean anal sex is completely safe—so don't let a guy try to convince you that it is. See, unlike the vagina, the anus doesn't have much lubrication, so its tissues are prone to tearing, making it easier for STDs (including HIV) to enter your body. So using condoms is a must. And even if the guy is wearing a condom, no one should have vaginal sex after anal sex unless the guy washes his penis with soap and water first and then puts on a new condom. The anus is filled with bacteria that can cause serious infections if they get into the vagina.
How do lesbians have sex, since neither one of them has a penis?
--Ashley, 16, Flint, MIGenerally speaking, sex is any intimacy that gives you physical pleasure—which can include touching, kissing, oral sex, rubbing, whatever. Besides doing these things, some lesbians do use sex toys to penetrate the vagina. But just because they don't have penises doesn't mean they don't have sex in other ways.
Can you get pregnant if a guy fingers you with sperm on his hand?
--Sandra, 15, Dallas, TXYes, it can happen, but it's not very common. Sperm can live outside the body for up to 48 hours, so if a guy has some on his hands and then puts his fingers inside your vagina, there is a risk of pregnancy.
Let's Talk About Sex!
Can a guy get a girl pregnant if they're fooling around with their underwear on?
--Kyle, 17, McLeansville, NCSperm is smaller than the holes between the fibers in your underwear, so your semen can pass through and come in contact with her vagina, and she could get pregnant. The risk is small, but it's not zero, so don't risk it.
My mom has genital herpes. Can I get it if I touch her underwear?
--Name withheld, 16, Castle Rock, COHerpes is a virus that causes blister-like sores in the mouth and genitals. It's most contagious during an outbreak, but it can be passed by an infected person at any time. Since it's not airborne, you won't get it from touching you mom's clothes or sitting on the toilet after she has. It's unlikely that you'll catch genital herpes from anyone without direct contact with their genital area, says William Ledger, MD., a gynecologist at Cornell University Medical Center/ New York Presbyterian Hospital. The only way you could catch it from your mom is if you wore her underwear immediately after she did without washing it. Not likely, right?
I hear some girls need to get 'stretched' in order to have sex or it will be painful. I'm a virgin, and that scares me. How do I know if I need to get stretched?
--Erin, 21, Lancaster, PAYou most likely have nothing to worry about, Erin. Some girls are born with Mayer-Rokitansky syndrome ("Absent vaginas"), a condition in which the vaginal canal is smaller than normal and has to be stretched to an average size. But it's extremely rare (only 1 in 5,000 girls in the U.S. has the condition), says Cathryn Tobin, M.D., author of The Parent's Problem Solver. The doctor stretches the vagina by inserting a thin plastic tube called a dilator into the vaginal canal. Most girls do experience soreness the first time they have sex because their vaginal walls expand from the pressure of the penis. But the pain is natural. If you're scared to have sex, it might be because you haven't found the right guy yet. So consider those things before you have sex for the first time.
I've never had an orgasm. Is something wrong with me?
--Heather, 17, Wichita, KSAbsolutely not, Heather. Lots of women don't experience orgasm until they're in their twenties—after they've had more experience with guys and feel more comfortable with their bodies. Orgasm usually occurs when arousal builds up and causes the muscles in your genital region to tighten and release in a wave of pleasure, says Howard Glazer, Ph.D., clinical associate professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Cornell University Medical Center. Research shows that 24 percent of women have trouble reaching orgasm either alone or with a partner, so you're not the only one! And keep in mind that you're young, so you have plenty of time to experience it.
--Kyle, 17, McLeansville, NCSperm is smaller than the holes between the fibers in your underwear, so your semen can pass through and come in contact with her vagina, and she could get pregnant. The risk is small, but it's not zero, so don't risk it.
My mom has genital herpes. Can I get it if I touch her underwear?
--Name withheld, 16, Castle Rock, COHerpes is a virus that causes blister-like sores in the mouth and genitals. It's most contagious during an outbreak, but it can be passed by an infected person at any time. Since it's not airborne, you won't get it from touching you mom's clothes or sitting on the toilet after she has. It's unlikely that you'll catch genital herpes from anyone without direct contact with their genital area, says William Ledger, MD., a gynecologist at Cornell University Medical Center/ New York Presbyterian Hospital. The only way you could catch it from your mom is if you wore her underwear immediately after she did without washing it. Not likely, right?
I hear some girls need to get 'stretched' in order to have sex or it will be painful. I'm a virgin, and that scares me. How do I know if I need to get stretched?
--Erin, 21, Lancaster, PAYou most likely have nothing to worry about, Erin. Some girls are born with Mayer-Rokitansky syndrome ("Absent vaginas"), a condition in which the vaginal canal is smaller than normal and has to be stretched to an average size. But it's extremely rare (only 1 in 5,000 girls in the U.S. has the condition), says Cathryn Tobin, M.D., author of The Parent's Problem Solver. The doctor stretches the vagina by inserting a thin plastic tube called a dilator into the vaginal canal. Most girls do experience soreness the first time they have sex because their vaginal walls expand from the pressure of the penis. But the pain is natural. If you're scared to have sex, it might be because you haven't found the right guy yet. So consider those things before you have sex for the first time.
I've never had an orgasm. Is something wrong with me?
--Heather, 17, Wichita, KSAbsolutely not, Heather. Lots of women don't experience orgasm until they're in their twenties—after they've had more experience with guys and feel more comfortable with their bodies. Orgasm usually occurs when arousal builds up and causes the muscles in your genital region to tighten and release in a wave of pleasure, says Howard Glazer, Ph.D., clinical associate professor of obstetrics and gynecology at Cornell University Medical Center. Research shows that 24 percent of women have trouble reaching orgasm either alone or with a partner, so you're not the only one! And keep in mind that you're young, so you have plenty of time to experience it.
let's talk about sex!
Can you get an infection from masturbating?
--Name withheld, 19, Denver, COThat's a great question—since so many people masturbate! The short answer is yes. Throughout the day, your hands pick up a lot of bacteria from touching stuff. When you masturbate, you can spread it to your vagina and get a bacterial or urinary tract infection. Both are curable with medication, but they can be really painful and/or itchy while you have them. So always be sure your hands are clean before you touch your genitals.
Every time I watch a sex scene in a movie, my vagina sort of thumps. Is that an orgasm?
--Jessica, 13, Fort Gay, WVWhat you're feeling, Jessica, is arousal. When you get excited sexually—which can happen even from seeing a sexual image—your body pumps blood to your genitals. The blood enlarges your clitoris (the part of your vulva that can trigger an orgasm after prolonged stimulation). That "thumping" you feel is the blood pumping to your genitals. Getting aroused doesn't necessarily mean you'll have an orgasm. You're just having a normal physical reaction to those sexy scenes.
I had a warm sort of explosion, but it wasn't the scream-and-break-things orgasm you see on TV. Did I have an orgasm?
--Jessica, 18, Sherman, SDEverything on TV is so overly dramatic, isn't it? In real life, orgasms don't typically make you scream and break things. They feel great—but that's about it. A typical orgasm feels like a buildup of muscle tension followed by a release of that tension. It's kind of similar to the feeling you have when you're about to sneeze and then you do. So if what you felt was like that (and it felt good), then you probably had an orgasm. Congratulations!
Is it easy for lesbians to catch STDs?
--Jazmin, 15, Opelika, ALIt's no easier for lesbians to catch STDs than it is for straight girls. STDs can be transmitted through all sexual fluids— semen and vaginal secretions. So you're just as likely to catch a disease from another girl as you are from a guy. Using dental dams (latex that acts as a barrier between the mouth and vagina during oral sex) or condoms on fingers can reduce the risk. Also, if vibrators or other sex toys are used, STDs can be passed that way. So sex toys should always be washed with soap and warm water before and after use.
--Name withheld, 19, Denver, COThat's a great question—since so many people masturbate! The short answer is yes. Throughout the day, your hands pick up a lot of bacteria from touching stuff. When you masturbate, you can spread it to your vagina and get a bacterial or urinary tract infection. Both are curable with medication, but they can be really painful and/or itchy while you have them. So always be sure your hands are clean before you touch your genitals.
Every time I watch a sex scene in a movie, my vagina sort of thumps. Is that an orgasm?
--Jessica, 13, Fort Gay, WVWhat you're feeling, Jessica, is arousal. When you get excited sexually—which can happen even from seeing a sexual image—your body pumps blood to your genitals. The blood enlarges your clitoris (the part of your vulva that can trigger an orgasm after prolonged stimulation). That "thumping" you feel is the blood pumping to your genitals. Getting aroused doesn't necessarily mean you'll have an orgasm. You're just having a normal physical reaction to those sexy scenes.
I had a warm sort of explosion, but it wasn't the scream-and-break-things orgasm you see on TV. Did I have an orgasm?
--Jessica, 18, Sherman, SDEverything on TV is so overly dramatic, isn't it? In real life, orgasms don't typically make you scream and break things. They feel great—but that's about it. A typical orgasm feels like a buildup of muscle tension followed by a release of that tension. It's kind of similar to the feeling you have when you're about to sneeze and then you do. So if what you felt was like that (and it felt good), then you probably had an orgasm. Congratulations!
Is it easy for lesbians to catch STDs?
--Jazmin, 15, Opelika, ALIt's no easier for lesbians to catch STDs than it is for straight girls. STDs can be transmitted through all sexual fluids— semen and vaginal secretions. So you're just as likely to catch a disease from another girl as you are from a guy. Using dental dams (latex that acts as a barrier between the mouth and vagina during oral sex) or condoms on fingers can reduce the risk. Also, if vibrators or other sex toys are used, STDs can be passed that way. So sex toys should always be washed with soap and warm water before and after use.
Let's Talk About Sex!
How do you calculate which days you're able to become pregnant?
--Amanda, 18, New York, NYIt's impossible to know exactly when you could get pregnant, Amanda. Here's why: You're most fertile around the day you ovulate—which, if you have a regular 28-day cycle, is any day between days 10 and 17 (counting from the first day of your last period). Since sperm can stay alive inside your body for up to 72 hours, though, that means if you have sex on day 7, you could get pregnant three days later, when you ovulate. Plus, many women ovulate at other times of the month, so there's no way for them to know when they could get pregnant. That means even if your cycle is regular, it's always risky to try to calculate when you could get pregnant. You never know for sure.
Can you get pregnant if you swallow semen?
--Krys, 18, Columbus, GANo. Semen can only fertilize an egg and result in pregnancy if it enters through your vagina. But although swallowing semen can't get you pregnant, it still puts you at risk for disease. Many STDs (like HPV, herpes, and gonorrhea) can be spread through mouth-genital contact. So always use a condom to decrease risk.
What do people mean when they say a girl's "cherry popped"?
--Alex, 18, Houston, TXIt's a slang term that means a girl's hymen has been torn by losing her virginity. The hymen is a thin layer of skin around the opening of your vagina. Most doctors agree that the hymen has no physiological function. At some point in life, Alex, your hymen will tear— but it can happen through any physical activity, not just intercourse. Lots of girls don't even notice because it happens while they're playing sports or inserting a tampon. If your hymen is intact when you have intercourse for the first time, it can be uncomfortable and cause you to bleed a little—and because of the blood, some (crude!) people refer to it as "popping the cherry."
Do many girls masturbate—or is it only acceptable for guys? Also, how do girls masturbate anyway?
--Danielle, 16, Kittery, MEStudies show that more than 70 percent of girls masturbate by the time they're 18; they just don't talk about it the way guys do because girls tend to be ashamed of it. But there's no reason to feel ashamed. Masturbation is a healthy way to learn about your body and what feels good for you. A girl masturbates by touching herself and rubbing her clitoris (a sensitive pea-sized organ at the top of the labia) with her fingers, sometimes bringing herself to orgasm. But there's no "right" way to masturbate. If it feels good, then you're doing just fine.
--Amanda, 18, New York, NYIt's impossible to know exactly when you could get pregnant, Amanda. Here's why: You're most fertile around the day you ovulate—which, if you have a regular 28-day cycle, is any day between days 10 and 17 (counting from the first day of your last period). Since sperm can stay alive inside your body for up to 72 hours, though, that means if you have sex on day 7, you could get pregnant three days later, when you ovulate. Plus, many women ovulate at other times of the month, so there's no way for them to know when they could get pregnant. That means even if your cycle is regular, it's always risky to try to calculate when you could get pregnant. You never know for sure.
Can you get pregnant if you swallow semen?
--Krys, 18, Columbus, GANo. Semen can only fertilize an egg and result in pregnancy if it enters through your vagina. But although swallowing semen can't get you pregnant, it still puts you at risk for disease. Many STDs (like HPV, herpes, and gonorrhea) can be spread through mouth-genital contact. So always use a condom to decrease risk.
What do people mean when they say a girl's "cherry popped"?
--Alex, 18, Houston, TXIt's a slang term that means a girl's hymen has been torn by losing her virginity. The hymen is a thin layer of skin around the opening of your vagina. Most doctors agree that the hymen has no physiological function. At some point in life, Alex, your hymen will tear— but it can happen through any physical activity, not just intercourse. Lots of girls don't even notice because it happens while they're playing sports or inserting a tampon. If your hymen is intact when you have intercourse for the first time, it can be uncomfortable and cause you to bleed a little—and because of the blood, some (crude!) people refer to it as "popping the cherry."
Do many girls masturbate—or is it only acceptable for guys? Also, how do girls masturbate anyway?
--Danielle, 16, Kittery, MEStudies show that more than 70 percent of girls masturbate by the time they're 18; they just don't talk about it the way guys do because girls tend to be ashamed of it. But there's no reason to feel ashamed. Masturbation is a healthy way to learn about your body and what feels good for you. A girl masturbates by touching herself and rubbing her clitoris (a sensitive pea-sized organ at the top of the labia) with her fingers, sometimes bringing herself to orgasm. But there's no "right" way to masturbate. If it feels good, then you're doing just fine.
